Vicarious offence.

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Never before in the realm of human history have many been offended on behalf of so few!

I could really just stop there and spare you the inane ramblings of my deeply offended sensibilities. The truth is that I am not in any way offended at all; I must, however, be in the minority in the digital age. All over the public media are groups of every type and blip on the human spectrum who have taken time out of their lives to be upset on behalf of someone they have never met, or are unlikely to ever meet.

Across the globe people are offended on behalf of a long dead prophet and respond by killing in in his name; others are offended on behalf of dolphins, sharks, coral and trees. Christians are offended on behalf of God, who is actually well able to defend His own honour and doesn’t need me as a defence lawyer.

As silly season approaches, newspapers will be simultaneously offended by the cancellation of nativity plays (which are so far removed from the actual story to be bordering on offensive) for fear of offending Muslim communities, and also by the Christians who take a stand for dearly held values.

It would make your head spin if you were to be influenced by it all. I have friends from every area of religion and lifestyle and am not in any way offended by them or their path through this life. We have completely forgotten that offence is a choice rather than a right, and to choose it immediately puts me in the weaker position.

My wife and I found ourselves in a set of circumstances in recent years because of choices which we had freely made; nobody had co-erced us into them and it was with free will and a belief that anything could happen if we were open in our dealings with others.

We allowed people access into our lives and home because they were in need and we were able to answer that need in many different ways. Now when you go down that road there is never any guarantee that the outcomes will be positive. Our experience was one of great reward but also one of great disappointment at times; ultimately the end result was not always as we would have chosen, but it was still the correct thing to do.

Something that I had not ever reckoned on was that people we know who witnessed the years that have gone by have come out of it with an offence on our behalf. We ourselves don’t feel that offence, but they do!

I have long looked on with amusement at the petty bleatings of tabloid newspapers in these times, but this is an entirely new dynamic for me.

So should we be regulated in our actions by friends or family? Of course we don’t live to ourselves but we cannot be moved by the sensitivities of the easily offended.

It is always my choice to take or refuse and offence.

 

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